Time Management for Busy Dads: How to free up time for the family: By Roland Poitevin

With our unrelenting focus on work and getting the bills paid we can easily lose sight of the things that really matter in life. In a survey of terminally ill patients none of them wished they'd spent more time working and all of them regretted not spending enough time on their kids and partners. Here are some winning strategies that will help you free up time for the important things in life and still stay on top at work.

Leave work on time. Commit to getting out the door on the dot. Choose one day a week to start with and then build on that success. You need to be assertive about this. Reduce meeting times by scheduling them into half our slots instead of 45 minutes. When you establish the time frame you will find the same amount gets accomplished anyway.

Set yourself a timetable for the drudge work. Having a fixed time for house work pays dividends by giving focus and routine that creates a more efficient outcome and frees up heap of time for the important stuff. If you can, hire a cleaner.

Plan your weekends well. Do not use them for the house hold chores or for work. Treat them as sacred family time.

Use your commute time wisely. Get a voice recorder and use it to dictate ideas while you drive. It won't save you time but it will make you feel like it's time not wasted.

In the work place develop a system to deal with the mountain of paper work. Categorize and separate the documents into different easy to access folders. Start your day by putting notes on each document that direct you quickly into taking the action necessary to deal with them in an efficient manner.

With email set yourself an allotted time one hour after you start your day and limit yourself to logging on only 4 times during the day. Reply once to multiple mails. Finally don't reply to mail after dinner, this is your family time.

Choose the two most important things that need to be accomplished that day and do them. Once these have been dealt with then you can move on to the next task. This will remove any feelings of being overwhelmed and increase your efficiency.

These simple actions will lead naturally to better time management and also reduce stress which means when your family needs you you're going to be there for them in body and mind.

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Pop the Question With Creativity: by Julie Johnson

How did you say, “Will you marry me? to your sweetheart? Probably it was not as unique as some of these ways. But if you are waiting for the right moment and right way, maybe these will give you some creative ideas! Nearly all of these are within reach of the average couple.

If you like extreme sports, sky’s the limit for ideas. A couple who liked skiing reached the mountain summit. Just as they were ready to begin, he proposed and she accepted. What a double rush they both experienced! A skydiving couple was engaged through a hidden sign and a nod as they sped toward the ground.

A TV game show winner suddenly turned to the audience and proposed to his girlfriend. What could she do but accept under such circumstances. Another fellow arranged with a movie theater to help him. At the end of the movie the couple was attending, a message flashed across the scream, “Angela, will you marry me? –Bruce Everyone clapped and, of course, after recovering from the shock, she affirmed his wishes.

One creative fellow got his neighbors to help. At a preset time, they flashed their lights off and on spelling out the proposal in code. A girl thought her sweetheart was busy miles away. She attended a preplanned scavenger hunt. The last item on her list led her to where he was hiding and, surprise, he proposed.

Not afraid to reverse roles, one girl didn’t want to wait any longer. So when they were on a date, she said, “Darling, you know if you would ask me to marry you, I’d say yes in a minute!. If that’s not your feminine style, a few hints won’t hurt like, “If you need to borrow money for anything, like, maybe, an engagement ring, I’d be able to help you ou or “Let’s predict where we’ll be living next year as a married couple

George took his honey out to eat at a plush restaurant. The environment was perfect for a proposal but he said nothing about it during the whole meal. Finally when they were ready to leave, he asked for the check. To her shock a beautiful ring was on the bill tray. He took it, slipped it on her finger and proposed.

A creative man bought a book of love poems. After the few pages, he glued the rest together, then cut a heart shaped hole in the stack. She read the first poems, then turned the page only to find herself face to face with an engagement ring! Allowing time for shock to set in, he then took it and asked her the big question!

Use of the media is particularly effective. How about taking out a full page ad in a paper you are sure she will read. When she turned the page and read it, he had the ring right there. The ad provides a very romantic souvenir of the day.

Speaking of media, a man rented a billboard along a route he knew his girl would travel, and paid for the proposal to be displayed on it. If you can be in the car with her, have the ring handy; if not, try timing a call to her cell phone as she passes the display. You might even be standing by the road, pointing at it with a ring box in the other hand!

Here are some ideas that include an airplane. Have a firm sky write your proposal in the sky over an area where she will be A more permanent version of this would be to hire a company to make and display a banner ad to fly over an event they are attending or beach where they are relaxing. If possible, as she reads it, be handy with the ring.

Marriage is an important step in life and should be entered with much thought. But that doesn’t mean you cannot be creative in the way you ask her to join you for life. Why not do it in a memorable way?

About the Author: AirSign has been providing creative http://www.airsign.com/skywriting.php skywriting and http://www.airsign.com/blog/creative-marriage-proposals-with-aerial-banners/ aerial banner messages around special occasions since 1996. Call them at 888-645-3442 and ask them to fly your message. It will be unforgettable.

Article Source: ActiveAuthors.com

Seven Ways to Overcome Shyness Start Using Them Now!: by Moni Arora

Most shy people try to console themselves with words like “I’m not shy. I’m just a quiet person.” How funny, because those two concepts that of shyness and quietness though they may seem similar, are from two different worlds. A quiet person has no problem mixing with crowds, but will only speak if they have something worth saying. Otherwise, they just shut up and listen. The shy person on the other hand, is bursting with the desire to speak, but is unable to because of the throat clamping feeling of anxiety.

It’s easy to overcome shyness! All you need to do is acknowledge that you are shy, and that you want to take steps to curing the defect. Here are seven tips for you to overcome shyness:

* Learn to love yourself. Appreciate that you are shy, but not retarded. Do not let the feeling that you are socially redundant because you are shy permeate into your mind. Your shyness is not a disadvantage therefore you should come to terms with it. This is the first step to banishing shyness.

* Seek out your discomfort. If you do not exercise your conversational activities, you might not lose of the feeling of shyness. Another step to overcome shyness is by deliberately seeking out social events to attend. The more you subject yourself to these events, the more you are forcing your hand it might be stressful, but eventually it would be worth it.

* Don’t run away from the situation. If you felt your last social conversation was a disaster and you have sworn never to have anything with it again, then you are running away from reality. I advice you instead to look at things differently and stay on course, it will definitely be worth it!

* Try to calm down. The thing with shy minds is that are constantly thinking: thinking up worst case scenarios in any discussion event. As a result, with a mind so filled up with bogeys and visions of conversation disasters, it is not surprising that you become tongue tied. Take breathing exercises and empty your mind of these thoughts instead.

* Practice in mild settings: a family gathering may work the trick. Try to see how you can get along with members of the family with whom you are more amiable and by doing this you are building up for the grand scenario.

* Imagine a situation, and imagine what you could possibly do to feel more at ease. I have discovered that mental visualization tends to work the trick.

* Try to think more of others than all the ways you can mess up the situation. Listen to them and consider what they are saying. That way, you can get a hold on the conversation and you wont’ have to stutter to respond to them.

These skills should be practiced, and you should bear in mind that it is not an overnight thing, as it will be slow, but surely you will snap out of your shyness.

About the Author: Moni Arora is a personal development trainer and internet marketing consultant. Discover how you can overcome shyness quickly by visiting http://www.MasterShyness.com where you can sign up for free tips on how to overcome shyness

Article Source: ActiveAuthors.com

Simple Ways to Teach Children the Value of Sportsmanship: by Dave Roth

What is sportsmanship?

In our modern society, we tend to idolize the biggest and brightest professional athletes in the world. It’s not hard to do when they earn huge paychecks and endorse the products our children want cell phones, clothes, cereals, etc. While their accomplishments are often impressive, their sportsmanship, or lack thereof, leaves something to be desired. Sportsmanship is, at its core, the essence that partaking in competition is done solely for the enjoyment of the game or sport itself and not for the purpose of winning. It encompasses a sense of fairness, respect, and fellowship with one’s competition.

Yet when we turn to these professional ‘idols,’ far too often we don’t see the sense of sportsmanship that we would prefer to instill in our children. Instead, we are inundated with scandals, arrogance, and controversy. The bigger they are, the harder they fall, as the saying goes. And so it also goes that the more the media hones in on their failures , although they are not failures any one of us couldn’t fall into easily. So how can we teach our children the value of sportsmanship in our modern competitive culture?

The essence of the game

Games for children are meant to teach them rules, competition, and sportsmanship. Far too often, pressure is placed on winning and the rewards for winning far outweigh those that come with finishing second. First and foremost in any competition for children should be the enjoyment of the game, not the score or the final result. Does this mean that all competition should be eliminated? No. What it means is that, for children, sportsmanship should come before competition. We’re hearing more and more that children’s sports aren’t declaring a winning side. While it’s good they want to spare the feelings of the children, kids need to learn about being a good winner and a good loser, because life will certainly teach them that later if not sooner.

Teaching sportsmanship

Teaching children sportsmanship starts with setting an ideal example for them to emulate. If adults focus on the score, become aggravated or too intense when playing a game, then that is imprinted on children watching us. Some simple things to keep in mind to help teach sportsmanship include:

1. Smile and laugh. Regardless of whether you’re winning or losing, keep a positive attitude about the game. Smiling is contagious and when it is associated with the activity and not the result, children will emulate this behavior more often than not.

2. Reward positive participation. Don’t focus on the result. Win or lose, congratulate the child. If the child has a poor attitude or doesn’t acknowledge their competition, then reward should not be granted.

3. Turn their attention to positive role models. Perhaps your child idolizes Terrell Owens. While talented, his behavior and attitude is the precise definition of poor sportsmanship. Point this out and then turn your child onto athletes who personify good sportsmanship.

Choose simple games first

A great way to teach children good sportsmanship is to get them playing simple games, such as bean bags. In fun, relaxing environment, winning isn’t what matters; the moments spent with family and friends is.

Author Resource:-> Dave Roth runs the SC Cornhole Game website, a store devoted to the game of Cornhole. They are suppliers of cornhole bags, corn hole boards, and cornhole sets.

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What You Can Learn From President Obama’s Mother in Law: by Dr. Rosemary

Now that Michelle Obama’s mother is living in the White House, will the cruel jokes and snide remarks about mothers in law finally stop? Will Marian Robinson, as first mother in law, be able to pave the way for acceptance, even respect, for this much maligned branch of the family tree? Only time, and the nightly comedians, will tell.

If you have a new son in law yourself, you can use Mrs. Robinson and other successful in laws as your guides. Let them teach you how to adjust to your new role. It’s not easy. Once you’ve made the final payment for your daughter’s dream wedding, you may find yourself relegated to the back burner.

Instead of you, your daughter’s new husband is now the one who shares her confidences. After spending the past couple of decades as an active and involved mom, do you now feel like a Lame Duck? Even more important, how can you learn to relate to the guy who is now the center of your daughter’s universe? Here are a few tips to get you started with your own son in law:

1. Move slowly into the role of mother in law, remembering that your daughter’s spouse arrives with his own issues, unique temperament and family rituals. Learn more about him and his family rather than expecting him to blend into yours. Remember that family loyalty goes both ways.

2. Imagine the situation from your son in law’s perspective. Recognize that he wants to build and strengthen his new family unit. Doris is trying to let go of her need to continue such a tight relationship with her daughter. “I know she is bonding with her husband, so I don’t snoop or ask too many questions. As an only child I don’t like to go halves with anything, so it’s hard for me to share my precious daughter. But I know that her husband has to be the focus for her now.”

3. Respect your daughter’s choice and learn to love her life partner. By focusing on how happy your daughter is and on your son in law’s positive qualities, you’ll be building on the mutual good feelings. This can serve as an emotional savings account you can draw on later when other situations lead to tension between you.

4. Hold back on your opinions, advice and constructive criticism, at least until there is more trust in the relationship. This can be a challenge, as Nancy found: “I’m very careful about what I say, so I don’t think my son in law knows that I’m holding back. We get along fine on the surface but I hope that some day we can deal with deeper issues.”

5. Avoid hot button issues like finances, religious observances, and work/home responsibilities. By taking sides, you make it harder for the newlyweds to sort out these issues for themselves. When you have expectations that are not shared by them, recognize that now it’s their turn to make this type of decision.

6. Be available to help when asked but don’t intrude. As the new couple settles into their routine and lifestyle, they may ask for your help or support. Pitch in and be responsive to their needs when you can, but don’t overstep the boundaries.

7. Find support from your spouse and friends. When you’re frustrated, share with others who will understand what you’re going through and use them as a sounding board. When all else fails, laugh together as inductees in the sisterhood of mothers in law.

These tips can help you build the kind of relationship with your son in law that Marian Robinson has with President Obama. He and Michelle respect her and trust her to help with their children. Embrace your new role of mother in law. You, too, have the power to make this an enriching chapter for everyone in the family.

© 2009, www.HerMentorCenter.com

About the Author: Rosemary Lichtman, Ph.D. & Phyllis Goldberg, Ph.D. are co-founders of http://www.HerMentorCenter.com, a website for midlife women and http://www.NourishingRelationships.Blogspot.com, a Blog for the Sandwich Generation. They are authors of a forthcoming book about Baby Boomer's family relationships and publish a free newsletter, Stepping Stones, through their website.

Article Source: ActiveAuthors.com

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Love: Is This Romance Or Is This Friendship? by: Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

James, in his middle 30s, was ready to meet his life partner, get married and have children. After dating many women, he met Cindy.

"She is really beautiful, although I'm not sure she's my type. But I think she is perfect for me. We have the same interests, the same values, we go to the same church, and we both want children. My friends who meet her think she's dynamite."

"But...?” I could hear hesitation in his voice during our phone counseling session.

"I don't know. There doesn't seem to be a spark, and I don't miss her when I'm not with her. In fact, I rarely think about her when I'm not with her. And our conversation doesn't seem to flow easily. We run out of things to talk about. Maybe the spark will grow. Does that ever happen?"

"Why not spend a little more time with her and see how you feel?"

It became apparent within a few months that the spark was not going to grow and the conversation was not going to flow. James still did not look forward to seeing Cindy.

"James, it doesn't seem that this relationship is going to become what you want it to be. Perhaps it's time to move on."

But James was afraid of ending up alone, afraid he would not meet anyone as sweet as Cindy. He ended up staying in the relationship with her for two years before finding the courage to leave.

James and Cindy were wonderful friends, but not good life partners. Romance just wasn't there. He loved her, but he never fell in love with her.

Abigail found herself in the same position as James, only she had stayed in the relationship with Andrew for 7 years, hoping that romance would grow. She knew at the beginning of the relationship that she was not sexually attracted to Andrew, but he was such a nice guy and he really loved her.

The sad thing is that Abigail really wanted children, but by the time she finally left the relationship, it was very close to being too late to have children.

Why didn't she leave sooner?

"I hate being alone. I don't know that I can be alone, and I'm afraid that I won't find another partner. Besides, we are best friends."

Both James and Abigail could have saved a lot of time if they had understood the difference between friendship and romance.

It is my experience that, if the spark and the flow aren't there at the beginning, they generally won't develop. I won't say never, because I have seen a few relationships where the spark did develop over time, but this is generally not the case. If the spark does not develop within the first six months of the relationship, then it is time to move on - unless a companionship relationship is acceptable to you. But if spark, flow and romance are important to you, then accept that you and your partner have a wonderful friendship but not a romance.

James soon met another woman, Val, with whom he had romance. He was very attracted to her and they could easily talk for hours. But he soon discovered that romance itself is also not enough. Val did not share his spiritual beliefs, his values, or his interests. Her rigid religious beliefs deeply conflicted with his deep spiritual beliefs, and he knew he could not raise children with her beliefs. He realized within the first few months of the relationship that none of this was going to change so he moved on, now open to finding a woman with whom he can have it all.

"Am I too picky?" he asked me.

"No!" Stay solid on what you want and you will find it!

About The Author
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is a best-selling author of 8 books and co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® healing process. Are you are ready to discover real love and intimacy? Learn Inner Bonding now! Click here for a FREE Inner Bonding Course: http://www.innerbonding.com/welcome/relationship_help.html, and visit our website at http://www.innerbonding.com for more articles and help. Phone Sessions Available. Join the thousands we have already helped and visit us now!

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Myths & Truths about Romance & Marriage: By Garry Jacobs

Myths about Romance & Marriage

>> Marriage makes romance permanent.
>> The intense longing I feel for my partner will become permanent sweet intensity if only we can always be together.
>> Romantic fulfillment is achieved by finding my perfect partner or soul mate.
>> Our relationship will be happy and harmonious if only my partner agrees to follow my advice. >> Most of our problems arise because I and my partner are so different from one another.
>> Our relationship will become harmonious if only my partner agrees to change.
>> Problems in our relationship prove that I have chosen the wrong partner.
>> My partner's attraction to others of the opposite sex proves he/she does not really love me.
>> Unless I react and protest what I find unacceptable, my partner will never change for the better.
>> I have lost the feeling of romance because my partner doesn't keep me happy.

Truths about Romance & Marriage

>> My partner's attention and affection towards me is the measure of my attention and affection towards my partner.
>> Relationships are spoiled when the partners compete and try to dominate one another.
>> A partner's love and goodwill is a most powerful source of protection.
>> Romance doesn't last because partners stop trying to please one another and instead demand to be pleased.
>> Physical, sexual attraction to another is a misleading and unreliable index of love, romance or marital compatibility.
>> The qualities we dislike in our partner always represent corresponding qualities in ourself.
>> The best strategy for successful relationship is to always be positive, never react negatively to your partner.
>> Cheerfulness is the surest and strongest foundation for lasting love and romance.
>> Romance depends on your attitude toward your partner, not on you partner's attributes.
>> The formula for romantic compatibility is complementarity on a bedrock of similarity. Contrast generates the intensity, sameness generates the harmony.

About The Author
Jacobs is an American-born consultant on business management, economic and social development with extensive international experience in USA, Western and Eastern Europe, and India. Jacobs is author of several books on business management and development. He has a BA in psychology from the University of California. The author invites you to visit: http://www.romanceeternal.org/

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God Is Agape Love: by David Nelmes

A beautiful article about the different levels of love, including some great spiritual insights:

Relationships are everything...simply because they are all that exist. Nothing has meaning until you decide how it relates to you or how you relate to it. It is the process of making these associations that will determine the outcome of our experiences in life.

We are creatures of love that have thrust ourselves into what appears to be a world of hate. We once knew there was only one form of love, but now the influence of fear and separation has provided us with the perception that love can exist on several levels. The current levels of love are:

EROS LOVE known as ’erotic love’, is based on strong romantic feelings towards another.

PHILOS LOVE a love based on friendship between two people who share a mutual, ’give and take’ relationship.

AGAPE LOVE unconditional love that is always giving and impossible to take or be a taker. It devotes total commitment to seek your highest best no matter how anyone may respond. This form of love is totally selfless and does not change whether the love given is returned or not. This is the original and only true form of love.

The description of ’Agape Love’ that is accepted by most beliefs as the love that God provides, is identical to how his love is described throughout A Course in Miracles , which is founded upon the primary principle that God’s love for us has never allowed him to even begin to see us differently, regardless of what we may have done or believe we have done. The Course is repeatedly clear how God never takes and only gives, which is how creation works since God creates by extending himself...as he also extended himself into what has come to be known as us, the Son of God.

God never takes...and since we are created in his likeness...with his same method of thinking and being, our true selves (not these ego shrouded human shells) also know this is true. We inherently know that it is never better to take or require that somebody give. Giving is natural and never includes loss of any kind. True giving is like creation in that you do not lose what you give, but you extend that thing and it grows larger as you give it, or share it...like sharing a story or experience.

True giving is rarely experienced on a physical level since we perceive the thing as missing once it is given. On a physical level, you believe you have less after you give or that you have more when you receive. As you can see, this physical world has nothing to do with agape love since this world is based upon taking and having more or upon losing and having less. Agape love is based upon giving through sharing and knowing you already have everything and have nothing to lose. Agape love acknowledges that we are all connected and can only move that thing amongst ourselves, but never outside, so we never lose it. Everything is simply shared.

In a spiritual reality, only thoughts of agape love exist. Nothing else can exist there since everything is in harmony. There is no thought of less or loss or sacrifice since all needs are met before they even exist. This is where the mind of our God exists and it is from here where he teaches us and speaks to us. Every thought or idea that has truly originated from the mind of God, originated from his center of Agape Love.

Since we are no longer centered in agape love, the issue we have while forming relationships is that we tend to severely limit the capacity of the relationship to what we can get from the other or what we think the other wants to take from us. This form of relationship stems from philos love which indicates you share a like mindedness (eg. if you agree with me, I will love you). A philos love relationship is a mutual, give and take relationship which ends the moment one side either does not get what they want or is asked for something they do not wish to give.

Our confusion on the purpose of love relationships is often then applied to how we think God relates to us, where we imagine that God only loves us when we please him, or that God will only walk with us if we acknowledge him, or that God will only extend his hand and carry us back to him in heaven if we agree with what we think he demands from us. In doing this, we have created a philos love relationship with God which is totally at odds with his agape love since agape love only gives and never takes and is void of any necessary condition. Agape love asks for nothing and gives everything....simply because we are the children of agape love.

Having built walls between ourselves and our creator, we have distanced ourselves from sensing God’s love and the world we see around us is a reflection of living without real love. This environment breeds calamity and destruction since that is the result of life based upon fear instead of love. If accepting perfect love can cast out fear, then likewise, accepting fear removes our ability to sense perfect love.

Fortunately, our creator views any problem or tragic moment as an opportunity to reach into our hearts and provide reason for change. No matter what loss appears to have occurred, he is not angry or upset at who we think is at fault because he knows nothing has been lost. Since material things have no eternal value, they do not matter at all to him. In addition, any person you believe has died, is still safe in spirit form, and since God exists spiritually, he does not sense the loss of this being and therefore has no reason to be upset at anyone. His only thought is to help us see that life can be happier... life can be fuller... it is better to be kind... it is better to be loving, and then our time down here will become a focus on preparing ourselves to return to our creator. Regardless of what happens here, He has not and never will lose one of us because we are created eternal spirits, just like him. Jesus proved when he rose again that you can kill the body, but the spirit remains, untouched and unaffected by anything that happens while here in this physical world.

Agape love is seeing the answer and sharing that with whoever is seeing or experiencing the problem.

Agape love is never judgmental and is eternally patient with any thing that must be learned.

Agape love is totally without demands or requirements.

Agape love is total truth in that it does not change, no matter what appears to change around it.

Agape love knows not of time since time does not exist in heaven.

Agape love is unconditional forgiveness for any event because agape love transcends the concept of needing forgiveness in that it knows we are simply misguided and therefore our actions are not held against us in the first place.

Like frightened children running through a dark forest, we act irrationally and do things out of fear and panic. Agape love knows this and seeks only to help us resolve our fears so that we can see clearly once again and return to full communication with our creator.

Nothing physical matters. Nothing can be lost. Nothing can be taken. Nothing needs to be given. In our true form, we know this, but right now we can only recite the words...but we don’t really believe them...and that’s why we are here. We are in a place where we believe we have been removed from agape love and have written books about a god who does not behave as though he is agape love, but this is not so. The closest our reality can be described here is to think of this as a collective dream on a universal scale. We, the Son of God, attempted to perform something separate from our creator and this is not possible, so instead, this action created a place... a dream, where Gods agape love does not seem to exist...and this is a horrific thought and thus our lives have been horrific.

God has sent the Holy Spirit to help awaken us and to help us see that this world is upside down and totally backwards in thinking. This world teaches taking. God teaches giving. This world teaches sacrifice and guilt. God teaches you have nothing to lose so there is nothing to sacrifice and therefore nothing to make others feel guilty about. This world teaches that fear is necessary to survive, but God teaches that love casts out fear and that we will only truly live when we cast out our fear and embrace agape love once again.

Every lesson, teaching or guideline that ever truly came from God, can only originate from the unchangeable spirit of his unconditional love and endless patience, and his truths, or love, can speak of nothing else. We do know the truth when we hear it because God created us in his image, therefore, we too are agape love. Once we learn to really embrace this, we will remember who we really are and then we’ll wake up to see our creator right where he always has been....everywhere...above us, beside us, below us, within us. Everywhere.

About the Author: David Nelmes - David considers it a wonderful blessing that his insight and writings can provide opportunities for those around him to see things from perspectives they had not considered before. He pursues Gods truths and invites you to join him. Web site: http://www.beingwilling.com
Article Source: ActiveAuthors.com

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How to Spice Up Valentines Day For Your Wife: by Tom Kranz

If you have been married for quite some time then you already know that it can be a challenge to give your wife a surprise on Valentines Day. You have already been through the dozens of roses and boxes of chocolates as well as the stuffed animals and taking her out to dinner. So just how do you surprise her with something fresh and exciting? Well the answer to that question is simple; you just need to be a bit creative and resourceful.

Why not give your wife a gift that will last throughout the year. There are many gifts to choose from that she can enjoy throughout the year. There are unique gifts as the wine of the month gift where she will get a different bottle of fine wine each month for an entire year. Many chocolatiers will deliver a monthly tasting selection as part of a chocolate taster’s club, where an unusual or new variety of exclusive chocolate will be delivered in a special gift wrap once a month.

You can really go all out and get her a coupon book or make one yourself. These make the best gifts as you can either get them preprinted from such places like Hallmark or you can sit down and make the entire coupon book yourself. This is a gift that she will enjoy over and over again and again. She will love the gift as it lets her know that you will take the time to do something just for her when she want or needs it.

The pre printed ones come with a variety of coupons. Each coupon will say something like “good for a 30 minute back rub” or “good for one bubble bath, complete with back scrub”. Be sure that you read through the entire coupon book if you buy it already printed so you know what you will be getting yourself into.

If you choose to make the coupon book yourself then you can tailor it to what she likes and for things that she needs. You can make coupons good for a free night of babysitting so she can have a girls night out or you can add something in there for a full night out, kid free, where you have a sitter for the entire night so you can go away for the night.

You can even include the kids in on the coupons. You can have them make coupons for 1 day of no cooking or 1 day with no chores. Let the kids be creative. This is something she will love to cash in on as women love to take a break from the family once in awhile.

No matter what you choose to do, try to make the gist something that will last her throughout the year. This will make her Valentines Day better then the others. It will add a bit of spice into each day for her and you as well. Personal, lasting Valentine’s Day gifts like this are the key to long term happiness in an established relationship.

About the Author: Tom Kranz writes articles on Valentines Day, Valentines Day gift ideas, and Valentines Gift ideas. His articles regularly appear on http://www.valentines-giftideas.com
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Empower Your Broken New Year’s Resolution Any Time of Year: by Wendy N

Found this great article on new year resolutions. Though not related to relationships, makes for a great read, so added it to my blog. Here goes:

You had good intentions. But that resolution is broken, or on its way. Just like last year. This year you’ll learn what to do about it. Next year you’re a pro. Frankly, there are problems with traditional New Year’s resolutions:

1. Why we make them: a yearly tradition. It a rare person who makes them only when aiming for something compelling. Making a New Year’s resolution is a tradition our country shares, not always meaningful to the individual. We create them haphazardly.

2. How we declare them: on New Year’s Eve or Day. We invest little thought or effort. We do it after imbibing champagne. Yet that little scribble is supposed to guide our year, inspire our lives? Who are we kidding?

3. Lack of follow through. We have no plan. We think that by making a statement and jotting it down, we’ve done the work.

4. Failure is expected. Perhaps required. We failed last year. The year before. Our friends failed. Our officemates. There’s a lot of joking about failed resolutions. It gets attention. Creates camaraderie. If you talk about success, however, you may become an outcast. Ouch!

5. Resolutions are forgotten. Do you write yours down? If yes, where is it? If in your keepsake box, or at the bottom of the laundry bag, how often do you look at it? Remind yourself? Make adjustments? Is NEVER often enough for you? So should we just stop making New Year’s resolutions? Not so fast.

Here are five ways to succeed with resolutions, if you dare:

1. Make them meaningful, whether tied to the beginning of the year or not. Do better by distancing them from the tradition of New Year’s resolutions you don’t intend to keep. Try Feb 1 as resolution day. Add meaning and stick to it ivity to your resolutions, by committing to very few; Make those simple and meaningful.

2. Enrich them with detail, but not too much: rite down the answers to these questions about the desired outcome of your resolution: What is it specifically that I want? (Usually an outcome or result: I will lose 15 lbs. this year.) Is it achievable—by a human being—and particularly, by me? How will I know I have achieved it? Be specific: what will I see, hear, feel that will provide evidence? Is this outcome within my personal control? (If other people and forces are involved significantly, it is not completely within your control. But if you can do your part and then work to enroll others in the mission, it may be quite do able.) What will it cost me: in time, resources, money, relationships? Is the outcome worth the costs? Do I have the necessary resources? Can I acquire them? To learn more about these powerful questions, search for info on the “well formed outcome” in articles about neuro linguistics.

3. Make goals manageable: Break them down into bite sized pieces, and grow them as you go. A client initially resolved to lose weight, start a degree program and find a new job all at once as part of her whole soul makeover. But with coaching (and coaxing!) she agreed to explore first what she wanted her new career to be, and take only the first required course. By the end of the semester, she had learned enough about the field to be goal specific, and began losing weight when new confidence made nervous eating unnecessary. The job then came from the recommendation of one of her teachers.

4. Flexibility trumps failure: Concreteness is helpful, but inflexibility is rarely helpful. Failure isn’t permanent or insurmountable. If you see the project as an experiment, whatever doesn’t go as expected is not failure but additional information. Become a good student and find the adjustments that are needed, then make them.

5. Be open to other insights and perspectives. Actively seek assistance and coaching from friends, and opportunities to be accountable—but not commiseration. Remember to reward yourself for even the smallest successes. ©2009 by Wendy Lapidus Saltz. All rights reserved.

About the Author: Wendy Lapidus-Saltz helps people break habits they don’t need, create possibilities they want, and remake themselves and their lives. To the question “It’s 2009, isn’t it time life got better?” she answers a resounding “Yup!” And she’s helping it happen. Find out more at http://www.hypno-attraction.com/ and http://www.nonsmoker4life.com/ . Article Source: ActiveAuthors.com