Pop the Question With Creativity: by Julie Johnson

How did you say, “Will you marry me? to your sweetheart? Probably it was not as unique as some of these ways. But if you are waiting for the right moment and right way, maybe these will give you some creative ideas! Nearly all of these are within reach of the average couple.

If you like extreme sports, sky’s the limit for ideas. A couple who liked skiing reached the mountain summit. Just as they were ready to begin, he proposed and she accepted. What a double rush they both experienced! A skydiving couple was engaged through a hidden sign and a nod as they sped toward the ground.

A TV game show winner suddenly turned to the audience and proposed to his girlfriend. What could she do but accept under such circumstances. Another fellow arranged with a movie theater to help him. At the end of the movie the couple was attending, a message flashed across the scream, “Angela, will you marry me? –Bruce Everyone clapped and, of course, after recovering from the shock, she affirmed his wishes.

One creative fellow got his neighbors to help. At a preset time, they flashed their lights off and on spelling out the proposal in code. A girl thought her sweetheart was busy miles away. She attended a preplanned scavenger hunt. The last item on her list led her to where he was hiding and, surprise, he proposed.

Not afraid to reverse roles, one girl didn’t want to wait any longer. So when they were on a date, she said, “Darling, you know if you would ask me to marry you, I’d say yes in a minute!. If that’s not your feminine style, a few hints won’t hurt like, “If you need to borrow money for anything, like, maybe, an engagement ring, I’d be able to help you ou or “Let’s predict where we’ll be living next year as a married couple

George took his honey out to eat at a plush restaurant. The environment was perfect for a proposal but he said nothing about it during the whole meal. Finally when they were ready to leave, he asked for the check. To her shock a beautiful ring was on the bill tray. He took it, slipped it on her finger and proposed.

A creative man bought a book of love poems. After the few pages, he glued the rest together, then cut a heart shaped hole in the stack. She read the first poems, then turned the page only to find herself face to face with an engagement ring! Allowing time for shock to set in, he then took it and asked her the big question!

Use of the media is particularly effective. How about taking out a full page ad in a paper you are sure she will read. When she turned the page and read it, he had the ring right there. The ad provides a very romantic souvenir of the day.

Speaking of media, a man rented a billboard along a route he knew his girl would travel, and paid for the proposal to be displayed on it. If you can be in the car with her, have the ring handy; if not, try timing a call to her cell phone as she passes the display. You might even be standing by the road, pointing at it with a ring box in the other hand!

Here are some ideas that include an airplane. Have a firm sky write your proposal in the sky over an area where she will be A more permanent version of this would be to hire a company to make and display a banner ad to fly over an event they are attending or beach where they are relaxing. If possible, as she reads it, be handy with the ring.

Marriage is an important step in life and should be entered with much thought. But that doesn’t mean you cannot be creative in the way you ask her to join you for life. Why not do it in a memorable way?

About the Author: AirSign has been providing creative http://www.airsign.com/skywriting.php skywriting and http://www.airsign.com/blog/creative-marriage-proposals-with-aerial-banners/ aerial banner messages around special occasions since 1996. Call them at 888-645-3442 and ask them to fly your message. It will be unforgettable.

Article Source: ActiveAuthors.com

Seven Ways to Overcome Shyness Start Using Them Now!: by Moni Arora

Most shy people try to console themselves with words like “I’m not shy. I’m just a quiet person.” How funny, because those two concepts that of shyness and quietness though they may seem similar, are from two different worlds. A quiet person has no problem mixing with crowds, but will only speak if they have something worth saying. Otherwise, they just shut up and listen. The shy person on the other hand, is bursting with the desire to speak, but is unable to because of the throat clamping feeling of anxiety.

It’s easy to overcome shyness! All you need to do is acknowledge that you are shy, and that you want to take steps to curing the defect. Here are seven tips for you to overcome shyness:

* Learn to love yourself. Appreciate that you are shy, but not retarded. Do not let the feeling that you are socially redundant because you are shy permeate into your mind. Your shyness is not a disadvantage therefore you should come to terms with it. This is the first step to banishing shyness.

* Seek out your discomfort. If you do not exercise your conversational activities, you might not lose of the feeling of shyness. Another step to overcome shyness is by deliberately seeking out social events to attend. The more you subject yourself to these events, the more you are forcing your hand it might be stressful, but eventually it would be worth it.

* Don’t run away from the situation. If you felt your last social conversation was a disaster and you have sworn never to have anything with it again, then you are running away from reality. I advice you instead to look at things differently and stay on course, it will definitely be worth it!

* Try to calm down. The thing with shy minds is that are constantly thinking: thinking up worst case scenarios in any discussion event. As a result, with a mind so filled up with bogeys and visions of conversation disasters, it is not surprising that you become tongue tied. Take breathing exercises and empty your mind of these thoughts instead.

* Practice in mild settings: a family gathering may work the trick. Try to see how you can get along with members of the family with whom you are more amiable and by doing this you are building up for the grand scenario.

* Imagine a situation, and imagine what you could possibly do to feel more at ease. I have discovered that mental visualization tends to work the trick.

* Try to think more of others than all the ways you can mess up the situation. Listen to them and consider what they are saying. That way, you can get a hold on the conversation and you wont’ have to stutter to respond to them.

These skills should be practiced, and you should bear in mind that it is not an overnight thing, as it will be slow, but surely you will snap out of your shyness.

About the Author: Moni Arora is a personal development trainer and internet marketing consultant. Discover how you can overcome shyness quickly by visiting http://www.MasterShyness.com where you can sign up for free tips on how to overcome shyness

Article Source: ActiveAuthors.com

What You Can Learn From President Obama’s Mother in Law: by Dr. Rosemary

Now that Michelle Obama’s mother is living in the White House, will the cruel jokes and snide remarks about mothers in law finally stop? Will Marian Robinson, as first mother in law, be able to pave the way for acceptance, even respect, for this much maligned branch of the family tree? Only time, and the nightly comedians, will tell.

If you have a new son in law yourself, you can use Mrs. Robinson and other successful in laws as your guides. Let them teach you how to adjust to your new role. It’s not easy. Once you’ve made the final payment for your daughter’s dream wedding, you may find yourself relegated to the back burner.

Instead of you, your daughter’s new husband is now the one who shares her confidences. After spending the past couple of decades as an active and involved mom, do you now feel like a Lame Duck? Even more important, how can you learn to relate to the guy who is now the center of your daughter’s universe? Here are a few tips to get you started with your own son in law:

1. Move slowly into the role of mother in law, remembering that your daughter’s spouse arrives with his own issues, unique temperament and family rituals. Learn more about him and his family rather than expecting him to blend into yours. Remember that family loyalty goes both ways.

2. Imagine the situation from your son in law’s perspective. Recognize that he wants to build and strengthen his new family unit. Doris is trying to let go of her need to continue such a tight relationship with her daughter. “I know she is bonding with her husband, so I don’t snoop or ask too many questions. As an only child I don’t like to go halves with anything, so it’s hard for me to share my precious daughter. But I know that her husband has to be the focus for her now.”

3. Respect your daughter’s choice and learn to love her life partner. By focusing on how happy your daughter is and on your son in law’s positive qualities, you’ll be building on the mutual good feelings. This can serve as an emotional savings account you can draw on later when other situations lead to tension between you.

4. Hold back on your opinions, advice and constructive criticism, at least until there is more trust in the relationship. This can be a challenge, as Nancy found: “I’m very careful about what I say, so I don’t think my son in law knows that I’m holding back. We get along fine on the surface but I hope that some day we can deal with deeper issues.”

5. Avoid hot button issues like finances, religious observances, and work/home responsibilities. By taking sides, you make it harder for the newlyweds to sort out these issues for themselves. When you have expectations that are not shared by them, recognize that now it’s their turn to make this type of decision.

6. Be available to help when asked but don’t intrude. As the new couple settles into their routine and lifestyle, they may ask for your help or support. Pitch in and be responsive to their needs when you can, but don’t overstep the boundaries.

7. Find support from your spouse and friends. When you’re frustrated, share with others who will understand what you’re going through and use them as a sounding board. When all else fails, laugh together as inductees in the sisterhood of mothers in law.

These tips can help you build the kind of relationship with your son in law that Marian Robinson has with President Obama. He and Michelle respect her and trust her to help with their children. Embrace your new role of mother in law. You, too, have the power to make this an enriching chapter for everyone in the family.

© 2009, www.HerMentorCenter.com

About the Author: Rosemary Lichtman, Ph.D. & Phyllis Goldberg, Ph.D. are co-founders of http://www.HerMentorCenter.com, a website for midlife women and http://www.NourishingRelationships.Blogspot.com, a Blog for the Sandwich Generation. They are authors of a forthcoming book about Baby Boomer's family relationships and publish a free newsletter, Stepping Stones, through their website.

Article Source: ActiveAuthors.com

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Love: Is This Romance Or Is This Friendship? by: Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

James, in his middle 30s, was ready to meet his life partner, get married and have children. After dating many women, he met Cindy.

"She is really beautiful, although I'm not sure she's my type. But I think she is perfect for me. We have the same interests, the same values, we go to the same church, and we both want children. My friends who meet her think she's dynamite."

"But...?” I could hear hesitation in his voice during our phone counseling session.

"I don't know. There doesn't seem to be a spark, and I don't miss her when I'm not with her. In fact, I rarely think about her when I'm not with her. And our conversation doesn't seem to flow easily. We run out of things to talk about. Maybe the spark will grow. Does that ever happen?"

"Why not spend a little more time with her and see how you feel?"

It became apparent within a few months that the spark was not going to grow and the conversation was not going to flow. James still did not look forward to seeing Cindy.

"James, it doesn't seem that this relationship is going to become what you want it to be. Perhaps it's time to move on."

But James was afraid of ending up alone, afraid he would not meet anyone as sweet as Cindy. He ended up staying in the relationship with her for two years before finding the courage to leave.

James and Cindy were wonderful friends, but not good life partners. Romance just wasn't there. He loved her, but he never fell in love with her.

Abigail found herself in the same position as James, only she had stayed in the relationship with Andrew for 7 years, hoping that romance would grow. She knew at the beginning of the relationship that she was not sexually attracted to Andrew, but he was such a nice guy and he really loved her.

The sad thing is that Abigail really wanted children, but by the time she finally left the relationship, it was very close to being too late to have children.

Why didn't she leave sooner?

"I hate being alone. I don't know that I can be alone, and I'm afraid that I won't find another partner. Besides, we are best friends."

Both James and Abigail could have saved a lot of time if they had understood the difference between friendship and romance.

It is my experience that, if the spark and the flow aren't there at the beginning, they generally won't develop. I won't say never, because I have seen a few relationships where the spark did develop over time, but this is generally not the case. If the spark does not develop within the first six months of the relationship, then it is time to move on - unless a companionship relationship is acceptable to you. But if spark, flow and romance are important to you, then accept that you and your partner have a wonderful friendship but not a romance.

James soon met another woman, Val, with whom he had romance. He was very attracted to her and they could easily talk for hours. But he soon discovered that romance itself is also not enough. Val did not share his spiritual beliefs, his values, or his interests. Her rigid religious beliefs deeply conflicted with his deep spiritual beliefs, and he knew he could not raise children with her beliefs. He realized within the first few months of the relationship that none of this was going to change so he moved on, now open to finding a woman with whom he can have it all.

"Am I too picky?" he asked me.

"No!" Stay solid on what you want and you will find it!

About The Author
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is a best-selling author of 8 books and co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® healing process. Are you are ready to discover real love and intimacy? Learn Inner Bonding now! Click here for a FREE Inner Bonding Course: http://www.innerbonding.com/welcome/relationship_help.html, and visit our website at http://www.innerbonding.com for more articles and help. Phone Sessions Available. Join the thousands we have already helped and visit us now!

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Myths & Truths about Romance & Marriage: By Garry Jacobs

Myths about Romance & Marriage

>> Marriage makes romance permanent.
>> The intense longing I feel for my partner will become permanent sweet intensity if only we can always be together.
>> Romantic fulfillment is achieved by finding my perfect partner or soul mate.
>> Our relationship will be happy and harmonious if only my partner agrees to follow my advice. >> Most of our problems arise because I and my partner are so different from one another.
>> Our relationship will become harmonious if only my partner agrees to change.
>> Problems in our relationship prove that I have chosen the wrong partner.
>> My partner's attraction to others of the opposite sex proves he/she does not really love me.
>> Unless I react and protest what I find unacceptable, my partner will never change for the better.
>> I have lost the feeling of romance because my partner doesn't keep me happy.

Truths about Romance & Marriage

>> My partner's attention and affection towards me is the measure of my attention and affection towards my partner.
>> Relationships are spoiled when the partners compete and try to dominate one another.
>> A partner's love and goodwill is a most powerful source of protection.
>> Romance doesn't last because partners stop trying to please one another and instead demand to be pleased.
>> Physical, sexual attraction to another is a misleading and unreliable index of love, romance or marital compatibility.
>> The qualities we dislike in our partner always represent corresponding qualities in ourself.
>> The best strategy for successful relationship is to always be positive, never react negatively to your partner.
>> Cheerfulness is the surest and strongest foundation for lasting love and romance.
>> Romance depends on your attitude toward your partner, not on you partner's attributes.
>> The formula for romantic compatibility is complementarity on a bedrock of similarity. Contrast generates the intensity, sameness generates the harmony.

About The Author
Jacobs is an American-born consultant on business management, economic and social development with extensive international experience in USA, Western and Eastern Europe, and India. Jacobs is author of several books on business management and development. He has a BA in psychology from the University of California. The author invites you to visit: http://www.romanceeternal.org/

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God Is Agape Love: by David Nelmes

A beautiful article about the different levels of love, including some great spiritual insights:

Relationships are everything...simply because they are all that exist. Nothing has meaning until you decide how it relates to you or how you relate to it. It is the process of making these associations that will determine the outcome of our experiences in life.

We are creatures of love that have thrust ourselves into what appears to be a world of hate. We once knew there was only one form of love, but now the influence of fear and separation has provided us with the perception that love can exist on several levels. The current levels of love are:

EROS LOVE known as ’erotic love’, is based on strong romantic feelings towards another.

PHILOS LOVE a love based on friendship between two people who share a mutual, ’give and take’ relationship.

AGAPE LOVE unconditional love that is always giving and impossible to take or be a taker. It devotes total commitment to seek your highest best no matter how anyone may respond. This form of love is totally selfless and does not change whether the love given is returned or not. This is the original and only true form of love.

The description of ’Agape Love’ that is accepted by most beliefs as the love that God provides, is identical to how his love is described throughout A Course in Miracles , which is founded upon the primary principle that God’s love for us has never allowed him to even begin to see us differently, regardless of what we may have done or believe we have done. The Course is repeatedly clear how God never takes and only gives, which is how creation works since God creates by extending himself...as he also extended himself into what has come to be known as us, the Son of God.

God never takes...and since we are created in his likeness...with his same method of thinking and being, our true selves (not these ego shrouded human shells) also know this is true. We inherently know that it is never better to take or require that somebody give. Giving is natural and never includes loss of any kind. True giving is like creation in that you do not lose what you give, but you extend that thing and it grows larger as you give it, or share it...like sharing a story or experience.

True giving is rarely experienced on a physical level since we perceive the thing as missing once it is given. On a physical level, you believe you have less after you give or that you have more when you receive. As you can see, this physical world has nothing to do with agape love since this world is based upon taking and having more or upon losing and having less. Agape love is based upon giving through sharing and knowing you already have everything and have nothing to lose. Agape love acknowledges that we are all connected and can only move that thing amongst ourselves, but never outside, so we never lose it. Everything is simply shared.

In a spiritual reality, only thoughts of agape love exist. Nothing else can exist there since everything is in harmony. There is no thought of less or loss or sacrifice since all needs are met before they even exist. This is where the mind of our God exists and it is from here where he teaches us and speaks to us. Every thought or idea that has truly originated from the mind of God, originated from his center of Agape Love.

Since we are no longer centered in agape love, the issue we have while forming relationships is that we tend to severely limit the capacity of the relationship to what we can get from the other or what we think the other wants to take from us. This form of relationship stems from philos love which indicates you share a like mindedness (eg. if you agree with me, I will love you). A philos love relationship is a mutual, give and take relationship which ends the moment one side either does not get what they want or is asked for something they do not wish to give.

Our confusion on the purpose of love relationships is often then applied to how we think God relates to us, where we imagine that God only loves us when we please him, or that God will only walk with us if we acknowledge him, or that God will only extend his hand and carry us back to him in heaven if we agree with what we think he demands from us. In doing this, we have created a philos love relationship with God which is totally at odds with his agape love since agape love only gives and never takes and is void of any necessary condition. Agape love asks for nothing and gives everything....simply because we are the children of agape love.

Having built walls between ourselves and our creator, we have distanced ourselves from sensing God’s love and the world we see around us is a reflection of living without real love. This environment breeds calamity and destruction since that is the result of life based upon fear instead of love. If accepting perfect love can cast out fear, then likewise, accepting fear removes our ability to sense perfect love.

Fortunately, our creator views any problem or tragic moment as an opportunity to reach into our hearts and provide reason for change. No matter what loss appears to have occurred, he is not angry or upset at who we think is at fault because he knows nothing has been lost. Since material things have no eternal value, they do not matter at all to him. In addition, any person you believe has died, is still safe in spirit form, and since God exists spiritually, he does not sense the loss of this being and therefore has no reason to be upset at anyone. His only thought is to help us see that life can be happier... life can be fuller... it is better to be kind... it is better to be loving, and then our time down here will become a focus on preparing ourselves to return to our creator. Regardless of what happens here, He has not and never will lose one of us because we are created eternal spirits, just like him. Jesus proved when he rose again that you can kill the body, but the spirit remains, untouched and unaffected by anything that happens while here in this physical world.

Agape love is seeing the answer and sharing that with whoever is seeing or experiencing the problem.

Agape love is never judgmental and is eternally patient with any thing that must be learned.

Agape love is totally without demands or requirements.

Agape love is total truth in that it does not change, no matter what appears to change around it.

Agape love knows not of time since time does not exist in heaven.

Agape love is unconditional forgiveness for any event because agape love transcends the concept of needing forgiveness in that it knows we are simply misguided and therefore our actions are not held against us in the first place.

Like frightened children running through a dark forest, we act irrationally and do things out of fear and panic. Agape love knows this and seeks only to help us resolve our fears so that we can see clearly once again and return to full communication with our creator.

Nothing physical matters. Nothing can be lost. Nothing can be taken. Nothing needs to be given. In our true form, we know this, but right now we can only recite the words...but we don’t really believe them...and that’s why we are here. We are in a place where we believe we have been removed from agape love and have written books about a god who does not behave as though he is agape love, but this is not so. The closest our reality can be described here is to think of this as a collective dream on a universal scale. We, the Son of God, attempted to perform something separate from our creator and this is not possible, so instead, this action created a place... a dream, where Gods agape love does not seem to exist...and this is a horrific thought and thus our lives have been horrific.

God has sent the Holy Spirit to help awaken us and to help us see that this world is upside down and totally backwards in thinking. This world teaches taking. God teaches giving. This world teaches sacrifice and guilt. God teaches you have nothing to lose so there is nothing to sacrifice and therefore nothing to make others feel guilty about. This world teaches that fear is necessary to survive, but God teaches that love casts out fear and that we will only truly live when we cast out our fear and embrace agape love once again.

Every lesson, teaching or guideline that ever truly came from God, can only originate from the unchangeable spirit of his unconditional love and endless patience, and his truths, or love, can speak of nothing else. We do know the truth when we hear it because God created us in his image, therefore, we too are agape love. Once we learn to really embrace this, we will remember who we really are and then we’ll wake up to see our creator right where he always has been....everywhere...above us, beside us, below us, within us. Everywhere.

About the Author: David Nelmes - David considers it a wonderful blessing that his insight and writings can provide opportunities for those around him to see things from perspectives they had not considered before. He pursues Gods truths and invites you to join him. Web site: http://www.beingwilling.com
Article Source: ActiveAuthors.com

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Empower Your Broken New Year’s Resolution Any Time of Year: by Wendy N

Found this great article on new year resolutions. Though not related to relationships, makes for a great read, so added it to my blog. Here goes:

You had good intentions. But that resolution is broken, or on its way. Just like last year. This year you’ll learn what to do about it. Next year you’re a pro. Frankly, there are problems with traditional New Year’s resolutions:

1. Why we make them: a yearly tradition. It a rare person who makes them only when aiming for something compelling. Making a New Year’s resolution is a tradition our country shares, not always meaningful to the individual. We create them haphazardly.

2. How we declare them: on New Year’s Eve or Day. We invest little thought or effort. We do it after imbibing champagne. Yet that little scribble is supposed to guide our year, inspire our lives? Who are we kidding?

3. Lack of follow through. We have no plan. We think that by making a statement and jotting it down, we’ve done the work.

4. Failure is expected. Perhaps required. We failed last year. The year before. Our friends failed. Our officemates. There’s a lot of joking about failed resolutions. It gets attention. Creates camaraderie. If you talk about success, however, you may become an outcast. Ouch!

5. Resolutions are forgotten. Do you write yours down? If yes, where is it? If in your keepsake box, or at the bottom of the laundry bag, how often do you look at it? Remind yourself? Make adjustments? Is NEVER often enough for you? So should we just stop making New Year’s resolutions? Not so fast.

Here are five ways to succeed with resolutions, if you dare:

1. Make them meaningful, whether tied to the beginning of the year or not. Do better by distancing them from the tradition of New Year’s resolutions you don’t intend to keep. Try Feb 1 as resolution day. Add meaning and stick to it ivity to your resolutions, by committing to very few; Make those simple and meaningful.

2. Enrich them with detail, but not too much: rite down the answers to these questions about the desired outcome of your resolution: What is it specifically that I want? (Usually an outcome or result: I will lose 15 lbs. this year.) Is it achievable—by a human being—and particularly, by me? How will I know I have achieved it? Be specific: what will I see, hear, feel that will provide evidence? Is this outcome within my personal control? (If other people and forces are involved significantly, it is not completely within your control. But if you can do your part and then work to enroll others in the mission, it may be quite do able.) What will it cost me: in time, resources, money, relationships? Is the outcome worth the costs? Do I have the necessary resources? Can I acquire them? To learn more about these powerful questions, search for info on the “well formed outcome” in articles about neuro linguistics.

3. Make goals manageable: Break them down into bite sized pieces, and grow them as you go. A client initially resolved to lose weight, start a degree program and find a new job all at once as part of her whole soul makeover. But with coaching (and coaxing!) she agreed to explore first what she wanted her new career to be, and take only the first required course. By the end of the semester, she had learned enough about the field to be goal specific, and began losing weight when new confidence made nervous eating unnecessary. The job then came from the recommendation of one of her teachers.

4. Flexibility trumps failure: Concreteness is helpful, but inflexibility is rarely helpful. Failure isn’t permanent or insurmountable. If you see the project as an experiment, whatever doesn’t go as expected is not failure but additional information. Become a good student and find the adjustments that are needed, then make them.

5. Be open to other insights and perspectives. Actively seek assistance and coaching from friends, and opportunities to be accountable—but not commiseration. Remember to reward yourself for even the smallest successes. ©2009 by Wendy Lapidus Saltz. All rights reserved.

About the Author: Wendy Lapidus-Saltz helps people break habits they don’t need, create possibilities they want, and remake themselves and their lives. To the question “It’s 2009, isn’t it time life got better?” she answers a resounding “Yup!” And she’s helping it happen. Find out more at http://www.hypno-attraction.com/ and http://www.nonsmoker4life.com/ . Article Source: ActiveAuthors.com

10 Romantic Thanksgiving Ideas For Couples: by Kathy Smith

Thanksgiving usually has been thought as this family event where large and abundant meals, families & football games were the main centerpiece during this Thanksgiving holiday season.

There're are a lot of things that need to be done during this season that you'd probably end up busy and you might end up neglecting your partner/relationship because of this Thanksgiving season. It shouldn't be the case. You should have time to insert a bit of romance and also let your partner feel how special he/she is to you during Thanksgiving.

Below are 10 ideas to give your partner and your love relationship that romantic spark that it needs:

1) Have fun cooking together

If both you & your partner enjoy the pleasures of cooking then do set a bit of time aside for both of you where you could try and cook for each other and enjoy the Thanksgiving treats that you'll each be preparing.

2) Be a date to somebody else

You could try and volunteer to be somebody else's date so you could probably help a person not be alone during this holiday season. This could make you more thankful with all your blessings and not focus on the many problems.

3) Attending that service during Thanksgiving

Be sure to attend at least 1 service then make this as the time for reflection.

4) Watch that festive parade during Thanksgiving

You and your partner could both watch the parade together before going on to having that Thanksgiving party dinner with either of your families. This ensures a bit of together time well before all of your families intrude in.

5) Have an unusual date by exercising with your partner

Do the unusual date by exercising together. Go biking around the neighborhood or you could also go to gym together. This will actually assist you in shedding off holiday fats as well as give both you and your partner some quality time as well.

6) Go driving around the countryside

You and your partner both should sneak out at sometime and just go for that leisurely drive in your car on the countryside. It will give lots of alone time with each other before you tackle Thanksgiving dinner with family.

7) Play the "Twister" game

You could both play this game when your day is about to close to ending just to really unwind a bit from all that chaotic but happy hustle & bustle that is Thanksgiving.

8) Cozying with the fireplace

Turn your fireplace on, make some really good cocoa, turn your lights down then play some really good and soothing music. These quiet moments are really the most sweet and romantic times.

9) Watching/attending a game of football

This can be made into a tradition or you could do this just once. You could either watch it on TV or you could attend it personally with your partner on the ball field. Either way, you'd be sure to have fun!

10) Prepare that private celebration for you guys on Thanksgiving!

Spend really quality time with your partner by having that romantic Thanksgiving dinner celebration for just the 2 of you. Make it really special and be sure to appreciate your partner and be really thankful because you have each other.

There are lots of things which you can do with your partner on Thanksgiving holidays to keep that fire burning even during this holiday season where family is the priority. Enjoy !

About The Author: Kathy is a food Lover! You can check out her very popular Thanksgiving Recipes website where she shares some of her Vegan Thanksgiving Recipes and Vegetarian Thanksgiving Recipes on http://www.quickthanksgivingrecipes.com
Article Source: http://www.articlecity.com/articles/relationships/article_3352.shtml

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The Silent Treatment: by Margaret Paul

Research indicates that children would rather be yelled at than ignored.

When prisoners are being punished, they are put in isolation, because being isolated is one of the harshest punishments there is other than physical abuse.

The silent treatment is a form of punishment, a way to attempt to control children and partners into doing what you want them to do. It is a withdrawal of approval, and can cause much fear in people who are vulnerable to this.

You are giving people the silent treatment when you shut down to them, closing your heart and refusing to interact with them or acknowledge their presence. You act as if they are invisible, not responding to them at all or giving them a very minimal and withheld response. Your hope in treating them this way is that they will get the message that they have displeased you. They have done something wrong in your eyes and deserve to be punished, deserve to have your love taken away.

Of course, what you are taking away is not love at all, since love is unconditional. What you are taking away is your approval, and for children and approval dependent adults, it is a powerful form of control.

THE CONSEQUENCES
While it may seem to you to work for the moment, there are huge negative consequences following the silent treatment. Children feel unloved and unlovable, developing deep beliefs about their inadequacy. While they may comply to avoid your withdrawal of approval, inwardly they are likely to feel lonely and heartbroken feelings that they can’t handle so they become angry and resistant to manage the feelings. Their anger and resistance may show up in others areas that cause problems for them and for you.

While your partner may scurry around to try to please you and get you to reconnect with him or her, the fact that you have so deeply disconnected creates feelings of heartache in your partner that may eventually lead to the end of the relationship. What seems to work for the moment may lead to exactly what you don’t want in the long run.

WHEN YOUR PARTNER IS PUNISHING YOU WITH THE SILENT TREATMENT
What goes on inside you when your partner shuts down to you?

* Do you tell yourself you must have done something wrong?
* Do you feel a sense of loneliness and heartache that feels unbearable?
* Do you feel alone and abandoned inside?
* Do you feel anxious and scared?

If you feel any of these, it is really because you are abandoning yourself and making your partner responsible for you. It is you doing this that is allowing the silent treatment to work to control you.

If you were taking loving care of yourself and taking 100 responsibility for your own feelings, here is what would be going on inside:

* You would be telling yourself: My partner is choosing to punish me rather than take responsibility for his or her feelings. Whatever I may or may not have done that he or she doesn’t like, I am not responsible for how he or she is dealing with it, and I have no control over him or her.

* You would be bringing love inside, letting yourself know that you are a good person and deserving of love.

* You would get out of range of your partner’s energy taking a walk, reading a book, calling a friend, or doing something else to make yourself happy.

* You would keep your own heart open, not going into anger or judgment toward your partner, so that when your partner decides to open again, there is no residue for you. You would not punish your partner for trying to punish you. You would just make sure that their punishment doesn’t work for them.

* You would embrace your loneliness and heartache with deep compassion for yourself, sitting with these feelings for a few minutes and then releasing them to Spirit.

Eventually, when you are truly taking loving care of yourself, others will stop using the silent treatment, since it will no longer work for them.

About the Author: Margaret Paul, Ph.D., best-selling author of 8 books, co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® healing process. Join thousands who have discovered real love and intimacy! Learn Inner Bonding now! FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com/welcome/relationship_help.html. Phone Sessions. Article Source: ActiveAuthors.com

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Relationships and Communication: by Brenda Williams

Relationships are hard work. In fact, there are many people who would argue that maintaining a relationship with another person is the most difficult thing one can endure. Human beings have been building relationships with one another since the beginning of time. Even in modern days, failed relationships can be linked to much of the undue stress and tragedy that humans face in the world.

Think about all of the people who use drugs illegally. Now, think of all the people who commit crimes. At the heart of it all, it seems like relationships play an extremely important role. There’s a saying that a lot of young couples hear when they are first married, which is that you shouldn’t go to bed mad at each other. This is true. People who get married today have over a 50 chance of getting divorced. So, now the question becomes “why?” Why is it that we can’t seem to stay together? Has the view on marriage changed? Perhaps. It seems as if a lot of young people today get married for the wrong reasons. Many people marry for financial reasons, and the the financial strain develops into the cause of the couple breaking up.

The number one reason that people fail at relationships with one another is due to a lapse or lack of communication. It takes two people to communicate effectively to the other. If one person is constantly doing all of the work in trying to convey feelings or ideas to the other person, then it is only a matter of time before problems arise. We are not mind readers. No one person is the same as the next, therefore we aren’t expected to get along. However, good relationships require good communication which requires compromise from either party involved. For example, if your husband is slovenly and leaves things out around the house, rather than reprimand him, let him know how you are feeling without nagging him to death. “Usually, you are so good about not leaving things out, honey would you mind just picking that up and putting it away?” sounds ten times better than: “I’m sick and tired of having to clean up after you!”

When it comes to communicating well, you have to be innovative. Everyone has something that makes him or her tick. Figure out what that thing is and use it to communicate more effectively. When you are first starting out in a relationship, you need to make sure that you’re getting involved for the right reasons. Simply recognizing someone for the physical attributes that they possess is not going to be enough to sustain you through the long term because as time goes on, people’s physical appearances tend to change. Similarly, you shouldn’t just get involved with someone based on material items or because of how much money they make because that, too, can change. Instead, look at the person’s character. How do they make you feel? How do their actions affect you? How do they treat other people? What sorts of things do others have to say about them?

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Article Source: ActiveAuthors.com

Funny & Sweet Quotes for All..

Look what I found..few great quotes for you, some funny, some sweet, but all so true! Enjoy!

Hubby and Wife

* Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots.~ Hoosier Farmer

* My husband and I have figured out a really good system about the housework: neither one of us does it.~ Dottie Archibald

* An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her.~ Agatha Christie

* To catch a husband is an art; to hold him is a job.~ Simone De Beauvoir

* My husband says I feed him like he's a god: every meal is a burnt offering.~ Rhonda Hansome

Parents and Children

* If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either. ~ Dick Cavett

* My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.~ Tim Allen

* As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.~ Oscar Wilde

* There is only one pretty child in the world, and every mother has it.~ Chinese Proverbs

* I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.~ Phyllis Diller

* You don't really understand human nature unless you know why a child on a merry-go-round will wave at his parents every time around - and why his parents will always wave back.~ William D. Tammeus.

* All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his.~ Oscar Wilde

Brothers and Sisters

* A sister is a little bit of childhood that is never lost.~ Marion Garretty

* A brother is a friend given by Nature.~ Legouve

* The Rule of Sibs: If your sibling gets something you want, you (1) try to take it; (2) break it; or (3) say it's no good~ Patricia Fleming

Friends

* A true friend stabs you in the front.~ Oscar Wilde

* Money can't buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy. ~ Spike Milligan

* A friend who is near and dear may in time become as useless as a relative. ~ George Ade

* A good friend can tell you what is the matter with you in a minute. He may not seem such a good friend after telling. ~ Arthur Brisbane

* A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked.~ Bernard Meltzer

* There are three faithful friends, an old wife, an old dog, and ready money.~ Benjamin Franklin

* Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too? I thought I was the only one.~ C.S. Lewis

Interesting Moral Story

A young couple moves into a new neighborhood. The next morning, while they are eating breakfast, the young woman sees her neighbor hang the wash outside. That laundry is not very clean, she said, she doesn't know how to wash correctly. Perhaps she needs better laundry soap. Her husband looked on, but remained silent. Every time her neighbour would hang her wash to dry, the young woman would make the same comments. About one month later, the woman was surprised to see a nice clean wash on the line and said to her husband: "Look! She has learned how to wash correctly. I wonder who taught her this." The husband said: "I got up early this morning and cleaned our windows!"

And so it is with life: "What we see when watching others depends on the purity of the window through which we look. Before we give any criticism, it might be a good idea to check our state of mind and ask ourselves if we are ready to see the good rather than to be looking for something in the person we are about to judge. "

Getting Along With Others

Found few inspiring insights from the writings of the great Guru Paramahansa Yogananda; thought it would be a great start to the blog. He wrote the following about getting along with others.

The greatest of all happiness, next to divine happiness, is to be at peace with one's immediate relations, those with whom one must live every day in the year. When people try to handle the extremely complicated machinery of human feelings without any training whatsoever, the consequent results are often disastrous. Very few persons realize that most of our happiness lies in the art of understanding the law of human behavior. That is why so many people are often "in hot water" with their friends, and, worse yet, at constant war with their own best beloved ones at home.

The basic law of right human behavior is self-reform....Whenever any trouble occurs with our friends or dear ones, we should inwardly lay the blame on ourselves for getting into an unpleasant situation and then try to get out of it as fast and as graciously as we can. It is fruitless to increase the trouble by loudly, unkindly, discourteously blaming others, even though we find that they are to blame. We can teach quick-tempered dear ones to mend their faults a hundred times better by setting a good example than we can by harsh or self-righteous words.

Something to dwell upon, isnt it?

Relationships - Tough, aren't they?

We may love them or we may hate them, but we just cannot ignore them. Our relationships are as much a part of our existence as perhaps mother nature. Keeping them nurtured is probably never easy, but we still need to, to be able to lead a normal happy life.

Be it with parents, friends, spouse, siblings or colleagues, we have our share of great times, good times, bad times and sometimes really testing times! Sigh..what can be done about it, thats just how life is.

A husband and wife love to spend time with each other, but also need their individual space. A mother strives to make her kid independent, but when he or she does, feels left out. An employer wants to be friends with his or her employees, but only to a certain extent, so that his authority is not compromised. Any of this sound familiar?

Lets come together in handling these tough but beautiful gifts of God. Surely, you have some good memories spent with your loved ones that you may want to share with others. Or you may be stuck in some tough spot you want to get out of and discuss with others in similar situations. Yet again, you may have resolved some relationship problems and may have tips to help others resolve theirs.

You are welcome to comment on a post, or write a post yourself. Just send me a message if you wish to post for my blog.

Come, share with us.. !